What Boy Abunda didn't tell his mom

Top talk show host Boy Abunda never hid the fact that he’s gay.  Even when people were discouraging him from becoming a TV host because of his gender preference,  Boy stuck to his guns and dared be who he is.

But he never came out to the person who matters most to him: his Nanay Lesing, even if she must have known the truth all along.

“I would sashay in and out of the house.   Hindi niya ako pinakialaman. Hindi niya ikinahiya ang aking  pagiging bakla,” Boy told a  press gathering for Make Your Nanay Proud (MYNP) Foundation.

Even when Boy introduced Bong Quintana, his partner of 30 years to his mom, mother and son never talked about the relationship.

"Pero kung  tinanong ako ng Nanay,  I would have told her,” Boy says.

Be the best

The Kapamilya host loves his mom so much, he knows she deserves the truth.
He also came up with a bigger way of honoring his mom and others like her by putting  up  MYNP and urging children to “be the best of who you are and the best in all you do.”

The award-winning TV host got his spunk and self-confidence from a mom who believed in him and taught him to believe in himself.

The machos on the street near their house in Samar can scream “Bayot, bayot!” and “Bakla, bakla!” whenever they saw him. Others may see his Waray accent and very Pinoy looks as a hindrance in his hosting career.  He may have forgotten all the lines in a declamation piece he was supposed to deliver before class.

But Boy never forgot that his Nanay never chided nor belittled him.

All she told Boy was, “Sa susunod, mame-memorize mo yan.”

Believing in himself

Do you wonder now why critics have a hard time putting him down?  If his own mom believed in him, why can’t he believe in himself?

This sense of self-worth made Boy look President Noynoy Aquino, other politicians, ambassadors, top actors and actresses  in the eye and ask them pointed questions.
It propelled Boy to the top of his career. It made him earn so much, he was able to build  a house he called “Balay ni Nanay Lesing” right where their old home used to be.

“She was very proud of it. Nag-iimbita siya ng mga kaibigan at sinasabing, ‘Tingnan mo . Yan ang ginawa ng aking anak para sa akin.”

Now that his mom was diagnosed with mild dementia,  Boy can’t help but long for the lady he used to have lively discussions with. 

Very articulate

“She was very articulate  We love to talk,” he recalls his conversations with Nanay Lesing, a public school teacher for many years.

Boy recalls how she wasn’t able to get her meager salary for eight years because she had to pay debts she incurred for his and his sister’s schooling.   He remembers how she used to walk barefoot 12 kilometers from their barrio to the public school and back.

“She never made me feel  guilty. She had no demands.”
Boy knows that his mom would be happy strolling along Luneta and  sleeping on a borrowed folding bed at the back of the Luneta grandstand with him.

From talk to action

Boy can go on and on with stories that explain why he lives his life for his Nanay.

But he’d also like to turn that talk into concrete action – this time for all moms and children out there.

MYNP’s plans include a Nanay Museum called Bahay ni Nanay which will promote what the group’s vision is. Kongreso ni Nanay is envisioned as a yearly gathering of mothers in partnership with Procter and Gamble and other sectors which aim to showcase the lives of people who have succeeded with the support of their mom.

Kalusugan ni Nanay  is a health and wellness caravan that will tour key cities nationwide.

Limits of maternal love

Boy knows maternal love has its limits. 

”It’s  not the be all and end all to society’s problems. Adolf Hitler was devoted to his  mom. So was Bin Laden.”

But it still is as powerful  as ever.

Make  Your Nanay Proud is not only the name of an organization. It is also a mantra worth reciting at the start of a brand-new day.

By Maridol Rañoa-Bismark | Yahoo Southeast Asia Newsroom